Saturday, April 26, 2008 @ 10:31 PM: God, I'm real tired.
Salvation finally came today. slept from 1130 ytd to like 12 plus today. i think i only woke up for lunch and went back to sleep later. so i practically hibernated today. YES!! i really needed sleep. everyday sleep for only 5 hours is not say very little but then, i dun get the fulfillment i want. hehe. well, school's been mundane as usual. nothing special happening. sad to say, but really nothing. get the feeling like i'm getting sick of life. nothing to do, nothing to say. tell me the purpose of living again? i kinda forget what it is anymore. give me something to do. give me something to be looking forward to. i hate what it is now. its like nothing interest me. people talk to me, is not that i dun wanna to reply them or anything. is just i cant find words to say. im sick of this. im sick of everything. i would not say God has not been fair to me or anything. its just that my world is like black & white now. its so depressing to go through life the way im doing so now. where have all my hopes, dreams and aspirations gone to? i can tell you, its down the drain. i cant contribute anything to my cca. so thats my hopes gone. i cant lead the way i want too cause it seems wrong to some people. so thats my dream. my aspirations? that i dunno yet. it sucks big time when everything you do people comment about it. you help them, they scold you. shit man. i really hope such motherfuckers would just die off this face of earth. you cant appreciate at least pretend to be grateful. i would very much 'appreciate' it.
You know what? this blog is fucking useless. i cant express anything i want to say
without people coming to tell me i wrote something offending towards them. honestly speaking, if you think that person is you, why cant you just think about whether if that thing you did would actually cause hurt to another. why so guilty? see, now i say this, confirm there will be people come say me. be it sooner or later. accept reality people, do onto others what you want others do upon you. well, lemme tell you, its payback time.
think the unthinkable, believe the unbelievable, forgive the unforgivable. can you do so? in fact, i dun really know if i myself can do so. im sick and tired of all the shit im getting. cause at the end of the day, the amount i give is proportionate to the amount of disappointment i get, or maybe even more.
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
Become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
so come on, tell me.
Sunday, April 20, 2008 @ 12:48 AM:
"what is power? when a criminal is brought to the emperor and he begs for mercy. the emperor pardons him. why? he is worthless man. that is power." got that from schlinder's list. cool movie, but yet, how true is that statement. how true...
pull yourself together. some things are simply not worth time wasting upon.
so come on, tell me.
Thursday, April 3, 2008 @ 9:43 PM: piang eh
heard some news, my heart sank immediately. in fact its still sinking. please dun frighten me.
so come on, tell me.